I have created…

…a horse-meat marinade to END all other horse-meat marinades. Makes the old aduuni makh taste like fragrant morsels from a distant shore. (Thanks to Kate for leaving a tower of spices behind for me when she moved to UB) Behold!

COMBINE: 1/3 cup Chin-su
1/3 cup oil
1/3 cup fake lemon juice
cayenne pepper
black pepper
onion powder
a glop of garlic

Then! The horse meat!

CHOP UP: that horse meat

DUNK FOR MANY HOURS: that horse meat

SAUTEE: that horse meat

SALT: that horse meat

CHOMP: that horse meat

TRIUMPH: over frustration and circumstance.

lisa frank horse

Advertisements

Food Blog: What’s in the fridge?

1)Cabbage

2)Vodka

3)Goat Meat

4)Pickle juice

Mongolia!

All snickering aside, I would like to thank the landlocked nation on which I currently hang my hat for allowing me the freedom, nay, the open-armed acceptance, to do the thing which was so frowned upon back in the United States, which is to drink pickle juice.
Amen.

Time

to start teaching the Counterparts about the advent of Transcendentalism? As soon as the resident intellectual returns from his week long bender, I say yes! To hell with definite articles, am I right?

I SAID AM I RIGHT?!?

Fuck it: The Literalist Poems

Because there’s no way I’m going to bother to do anything with these before I leave.

The Literalist Poems
written by me: Jessica Madison

1)Manifesto:
A Manifesto is something you put at the beginning so you can tell everyone.

2)Halloween:
Halloween was such a long time ago, and yet, not that long ago.

3)The Sun:.
The sun will not die for at least a while.

4)I’m so sorry:
I’m really sorry.

5)Him:
At least we’re better than He is.

6)Halloween 2:
Halloween was about five months ago, both a long and a short time.

7)Are:
You guys Presbyterian?

8)Chicken Soup:
When there’s chicken in that soup, it’s chicken soup.

9)The Rain:
I hate that rain.

10)Note to Jessica:
This is a note to say that I went to the coffee shop.

11)The Note:
It’s nice to get a note.

12)I’m trying to move this person:
Excuse me. Could you move?

14)All Natural:
That means it actually happened.

15)Chicken Soup 2:
There’s chicken in that soup.

16)Man Hats:
I’d say we’ve seen five so far.

17)Dear God:
I agree with everything you’ve been saying.

18)Actually:
Means it actually happened.

19)Abstracts:
Except for…

20)Blood:
That’s blood!

For more information regarding The Literalist Movement, contact your local blogging chapter.